Ode to my Mirror & My Love Michael

Sometimes I find solace in looking at myself in the mirror. It’s not anything to do with vanity; it’s just the one solid part of my life that I know the best and is the least confusing. I wouldn’t know, but I guess it would be similar to looking at a fellow soldier in the midst of a battle. You know that someone out there is just as scared shitless as you are… except with me, it’s just an illusion. At least I have an illusion.

Another reason that I’m so comforted with my face is that I KNOW my face. I know every detail. I know the small, pointed French nose. I know the green eyes that change from teal to green to aqua. I know the eyebrows that are darker than my hair and sometimes have a few strays that need to be tweezed. I know the salmon pink colored mouth that sometimes has a plump lower lip or else is just a medium size. I know the mole on the left side of my chin; I call it my beauty mark. I know all the freckles that connect it all. I know my face.

The only other image in the mirror that would put me at just as much ease is my love Michael. He’s the fellow soldier hiding with me behind the bunker. The one who has my back always, and I have his. I KNOW his face. I know the slightly hooked nose. I know the beautiful green eyes with large hints of blue surrounded by long curly lashes. I know the perfectly not-too-thick not-too-thin eyebrows that he has that are the perfect size for a guy. I know the dark pink plump pillow lips that frame a perfect, adorable smile. I know the dark chocolate color of his soft, silky hair that falls across his forehead, and often into his eyes. I know his milky white skin that connects it all. I know his face.

Whenever I am alone in the world, or seemingly so, I think of him and remind myself that I’m only physically alone at the moment. He is always there for me. He always knows when to hold me tight, stroke my hair, and kiss the top of my head. He always knows what to say that will help me realize how lucky I am and he tells me how lucky he is to have me. Without him, I’d be lost wandering around in No Man’s Land, with no fellow soldier to pull me out of harms way and chastise me for being an idiot. Without him, I don’t even think my familiar reflection will be enough to comfort me. I’d forever wander the earth like a chicken with its head cut off. I’d constantly be dating only 2^nd bests, or worse. I’d constantly be “settling” instead of having exactly whom I want, and whom I should be with. I’d be nowhere I want to be.